Fork in my Life..

So I am at a really difficult place in my life at this moment. I have made a decision that could affect my future. While at first I was so rack with fear of the consequences that would come from this action, I now realize that whatever happens He is still my God. No matter the outcome He reigns supreme in my life. There will be pain with either decision made, but that is what I deserve. A loving father disciplines those he love. I must be loved a lot. I never have really been able to "get away" with anything in my life. I go into sin and can be in it for a while and then it all comes crashing down around me.

You think I would learn by now, but no I am a stupid human and make mistakes all over again. This time thought I think I am finally realizing how dumb some of my decisions can be and will not allow the Enemy to talk me into making them again. He is so good at lulling me into complacency that I get so comfortable I go back into my old ways. I would rather be in the fires with the Lord than be in the comfort of the world. I literary fell asleep on the job. Like a guard that falls asleep on the job and lets the store get robed so I have fallen asleep and let the enemy rob me of a opportunity. A chance to finish. I will never forget, when I finished E.S.O.A.L. God showed me that I am not a quitter like the world had be telling me I was for so long.

We no matter the outcome I am still loved by Him. Although I am still scared His arms are around me and hold me tight. I love my Lord an all he does in my life. I am just going to live James 1:2-4 out and count this trial as joy and a blessing for a opportunity to grow. So basically I am at a fork in the road and no matter what way I go. Both paths lead to the Lord.